I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
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