YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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