It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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