Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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