Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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