Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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