nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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