the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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