I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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