Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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