how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
