every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
