Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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