Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
