I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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