i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
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