Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
