do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
