He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
