The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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