I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
