I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Well I just put wine in my tea
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