you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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