I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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