my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize