i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
