my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
