In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i just had sex bonerless
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
