wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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