Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
