wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
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