Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
