Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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