I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
handjob tips. give me some.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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