no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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