is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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