Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
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