After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
