Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I'm having to shit out rocks
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
