You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
