I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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