3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
