Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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