I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
