Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Randomize
