I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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