do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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