Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize