I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
