is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
